Life vs. Work

How many times do you say to your co-workers, "Go home. You work too hard." And they sigh, and roll their eyes, agree wholeheartedly and sit down to the computer again.
This is all about managing expectations, and I encourage everyone to be part of the generation making it clear that they expect to be left alone when on vacation. They expect to have time to themselves. They expect not to have to justify leaving work at 5:00pm on Friday!

Managers, especially in the nonprofit sector, need to help. We are all committed to making our world a little better, so build on that shared goal and encourage your employees' after-work activities. Tell them you appreciate their contribution to our community not just when they're working for you, but when they're coaching a kids' hockey team, mowing the elderly neighbors' lawn, and stage managing the local theatre production. Be flexible and look for opportunities to model limit-setting behavior.

If you can, read this month's copy of Madison Magazine. Rebecca Ryan's article "Getting a Life" touches on the loyalty an organization can create by appreciating the whole person, not just the wage slave. (You can find her whole book on the subject at Next Generation Consulting's website.

You can actually limit your involvement in your work, no matter what kind of work you do. Try it!

Addiction

I have a good friend (everyone should) whose life wandered parallel to mine for some years. We were founding members of the pagan group called Prism Circle in Colorado together. He was, and is, a bright-eyed, long-locked Pan on the outside, but internally his mind whirs away making connections, predictions and calculations. He's complex. He runs the numbers.
Every year at the end of October Samhain rolls around, the NeoPagan New Year. We spend some time ruminating on what has been and pondering what could be, and (if we're brave enough) we calculate the difference and get rid of the excess to make room for what we need. Permanently. No take-backs. It's scary, cutting bits out of your psyche. It's not done lightly.
Anyway. Back to this friend.
The first year we celebrated Samhain as a group, we all announced what we were giving up. Say it, mean it, make it real. I heard "smoking", "ten percent of my income," "my second car," and "self-pity," among other things. And then it was his turn.
"What do you leave behind?," the Fool asked him. "What do you cast away?"
"Fear," he said.

That year he started working with the theatre. He started singing again, acting, building sets. He lost weight, he gained friends.

The next year at Samhain, we were around the fire again. "What do you leave behind?"
"Taking my anger out on my spouse." "My anger towards my ex-husband." "The job I didn't get." And again, he said, "Fear."

That year he left the job that had been over-working him for years. He had no other means of support. He worked in his garden, he traveled. He fell in love, fell out of love, and volunteered with many local organizations.

I couldn't be with the group this year for Samhain, and I missed them. But while I was doing my own introspection, determining what I needed to leave behind, I heard his voice. "Fear." He said. Every year he gets a little closer, lets a little more of it go. Every year I like him better. What would you do if you weren't afraid?

Try it and see.